Damp: Tired: Eyes

“You never know what you got until it’s gone.”

For example…. Internet. I’ve been trying to do really important stuff for school all day today but the internet refused to work in each class. My laptop is in fine condition now that I’m home, but I was unable to complete any assignments today. This is looking to be a long weekend, that’s for sure.

I still miss Cinderella. I know, it’s been a whole week, but I’m still pretty sad. I’ve never had a sister before, and now I do, so I’m sad that she’s gone. I hold on to the hope that she will be visiting come this summer. That will be a fine day; I know I shall enjoy that. It’s odd… I haven’t really been into girls this week since Cinderella left. Sure, I like girls, I’m still totally straight, but the few girls (like two, but I feel ever so pathetic saying that… So let’s go with 50… Yeah, 50. I like 50 girls.) I do like I haven’t really considered pursuing anymore. I got a little sister who’s awesome. I kind of feel that if I do get a girlfriend and Cinderella comes this summer, I’ll give more time to the girlfriend. I couldn’t do that to Cinderella. It’s a really weird, really odd kind of feeling. I’ve never been like this with my little brother. I don’t know why, I guess we just don’t see eye to eye or have the same interests or something; I just know that I get along with and enjoy Cinderella more than him. Not that I don’t love him or desire a stronger bond with him, but it just isn’t there right now. It makes me want to cry sometimes.

Tears have become part of my regular schedule it would seem. I can’t help but find myself crying out of nowhere in the most random of situations. Subtle things kick off an emotional stage for me and I’ve never quite understood it. For example, absurd as it may be, I cry when I’m alone in the dark. There’s really no reason to, I’m fine, but I get so out of it and begin to cry. Sometimes I don’t even mean to cry. There will be times where it just happens and people think I’m sad when I’m not. Don’t get me wrong, I do like the friendly support when I am crying, people letting me know they care, but I get so awkward. You’re all very lovely people, I thank you for that. For now, I must retire to my warm, comfortable, beautiful bed for a good night’s sleep.

 

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